Becoming Lutheran: A Blog Series Part 1- The End

karajane92
Oct 8, 2015
3 min read

I grew up in an Evangelical home. My parents both spent nearly a decade as missionaries with Campus Crusade for Christ. I was raised to know the "Four Spiritual Laws", I was given Josh McDowell books, sent to summer camp to sing with Todd Agnew and apologetics conferences to learn to defend my faith. Like many other christians my age Focus on the Family products had a substantial place in our household. I was a Jesus Freak, I saw people at the pole and to put the Cherry on top of it all I made my mother proud by choosing to attend her Alma Mater, Oral Roberts University.

And if it weren't for the title you'd probably think this is just another blog post about how an Evangelical thought they knew Jesus but was living like a hyprocrite on the inside and their life was still strifed with sin and unpleasentness because they forgot for a second that Jesus is their best friend and partner who will carry them through anything. Yeah I have read a lot of those, and still find them as empty as my wallet (A few dollars here and there but nothing substantial to live on)

Spoiler Alert: The answer at the end of this

isn't "Finding Jesus"

Don't get me wrong I love the household I was raised in. I know I wouldn't be who I am today without being raised in all of that. But as I got older, and life got harder I started to doubt everything I so heavily held on too and spoiler alert: the answer at the end of this isn't "Finding Jesus."

So let's start at the end of my Christian life as I knew it. I was 20, freshly graduated from college working and living in the new world. It is also when I stopped willfully going to church. I knew that it was wrong. I would listen to worship music on the way to church hoping that even if my heart wasn't in the right place obedience still meant something. My roommates would pull me out of bed and drag me to church with them. I would sit there, annoyed for a whole hour while the pastor spewd some BS. At ORU I had one of the greatest speakers in the world to listen too twice a week, and now I am back to mediocre at best preacher. It was hard. It wasn't long until roommates moved out, or left for the summer and I was alone and pretty much had given up church altogether. I didn't believe they had anything for me. I viewed the service as a pep rally, and nothing more.

Later down the line when looking back as to why I left, and not just left but felt almost betrayed- It came down to a few things: I was hurt and could not find the answers I needed in the evangelical church; I was burnt out and no longer felt like trying to keep up; Lastly, I was dienfranchised. Every discussion, sermon, etc sounded extremely shallow and cliche and if I was going to believe in Jesus, if I was going to believe in God I needed Him to more than silly acronyms or motivational sayings. I was desperately hungry for more and couldn't seem to find it anywhere.

Part 2: Discovering Luther - Coming Soon